losing myself.

Seriously.
really donno what is becoming of me now.
feeling that i m slowly giving up.
and becoming a super irritating difficult kid nowadays.

get pissed off by the slightest things.
and anything related to work i get really lethargic.
i get rest.
if sleeping @ 3am and waking up automatically/forcefully @ 7am counts?
i get some play.
shopping. cycling. stoning. reading. tv. movie. bitching.
i get excited.
planning for aussie trip. that holidays are starting after the dreaded school week.
and i feel so blardy hell pulled on two ends and so guilty.
that im actually excited for the execution of plan x in time to come.

all this whole week had been thinking alot.
i get either pple scolding me everyday;
or pple feeling ultra wasteful (if i give it all up now);
or pple giving me do-what-u-like-but-i-don't-agree advices.

But some are really encouraging, which i don't even know whether its a good or bad thing! sigh... if someone just tell me right in the face: STOP IT and probably thats much better. sigh sigh sigh.

i think im losing myself.
in the lala land of planet x.
someone save me. scold me. kill me.